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Dating as a Sex Worker: Why it’s Complicated

Many guys find intimacy with a sex worker (Escort, Stripper, Exotic Dancer, Brothel Worker, Erotic Massage, etc.) very intriguing. However, when they get into an intimate relationship with a Sex Worker, it may not turn out as they expected. Sex workers are not interested in dating clients who try to get free sex by saying things like, “let’s go out for drinks one night when you’re not working” or “let’s go out for dinner one night, if your boyfriend is okay with it” – trying to find out if I have a boyfriend and whether I would be interested in having sex outside of work. I am referring to guys (and yes, they are often clients at first, but not always) who are interested in getting into a romantic relationship with a Dating as s Sex Worker and calling them their girlfriend.

Date a Sex Worker

To date a sex worker, you do not have to be a client. I had two different thoughts about dating guys when I entered the Escort Industry: The idea was that if a guy was my client already and desired to date me, he would be familiar with my work and understand that I do sleep with men and couples for work (which is how we met!) and he wouldn’t have any problems with me sleeping with him; this would also avoid the awkward and often embarrassing conversations. One of the most common things a sexual worker says to someone who doesn’t know what they do is that they have sex with people for money as part of their job. Can I continue to work for the client and have sex with other men and couples for money? Do you think that dating an accountant is a relationship that will end when they no longer see clients to do accountancy work and provide accounting advice?

Second, I felt I should never date a client while doing sex work. It’s the old cliché about never mixing business with pleasure. In addition, they believe if a client pays you regularly, treats them well, etc, it makes no sense to suddenly stop seeing them as a paying client and start seeing them for free? I believe this 99% of the time, but the few times I’ve considered a client to date a sex worker and have actually done so, the money issue never came up. If I was concerned about losing them as a paying client, I probably wouldn’t dated them. Having been a Sydney Escort for many years, I wouldn’t have pursued it. This meant I wasn’t chasing money from a client (despite them saying they would take care of me for life). As for what I really wanted, I thought I was going to get it, regardless of my job; love, affection, a good and healthy relationship!

When you are dating a Sex Worker, you cannot have monogamy or traditional dating concepts.

Whenever I am in a relationship, I find the toughest thing to accept is that we will continue to engage in sexual activity with clients for money – like I mentioned earlier, it is what we do, and it has always been part of what we do. Having said that, I know you’re thinking, “But on top of all that, why on earth would you want a relationship with me as a Sydney escort, since I have to attend to other men and couples for sex in order to earn my living.?” I have never understood why guys would torture themselves (and ultimately me) by entering into a relationship that is clearly not monogamous? While there are some guys out there that don’t want us to perform sex work on them while they are in a relationship with them, they often mislead us by pretending to be okay with it when the truth is they are really not able to handle it. My opinion is that dating with jealous and controlling guys, even though they are incapable of handling escort work, is usually very unhealthy right from the start. The same way that a lot of guys cannot handle our job, which involves having so many sexual partners during our shifts, too many Sydney escorts have pursued relationships with them regardless of the fact that they are unable to handle sex work. How can those of us who are Sydney escorts find it tolerable to entertain relationships even if they already display warning signs of a troubled future? The reason for this is probably because we aren’t sure if this man will accept us or give us what we want as we embark on a relationship with him. The majority of the time, a relationship ends in tears because the guy doesn’t give us what we want.

What you need to know when Dating a Sex Worker

 

The following is a list of things I believe are Tips for Dating a Sex Worker

In the field of sexual work, those who are involved in sex should always remember that sex is merely sex when they are having sex with their clients. Clients should not be expected to do anything else.

In Australia, we have developed a profound cultural tradition that values sexual acts as highly sacred, private, and often taboo in contexts such as marriage and divorce. My principles state that these matters should only be discussed in strict confidence between a man and a woman (yes, there was a time in Australia when homosexuality was still illegal, and when homophobia was abolished only in the 1980s). Although it is true that this is one of the right things to do, who can give a moral judgment on the matter? It is very common to see prostitution, sex work, escorting, etc. being very common in various parts of the world and in several different cultures. As a result of this, it has become a viable means of generating income for the poor if they are unable to attend school. For example, in Thailand this has become a reality. Despite the fact that it is a draconian belief that no man should have sex before marriage, or that women should only have one partner at any given time, regardless of their feelings, it needs to be changed today. It’s okay if you disagree with this statement, but at the same time, you must recognise that not everyone has the same taste. That’s fine, if you agree with this statement, but only if you understand that not everyone is the same as you are. While humanity has achieved great gains in the last century in terms of human rights, as well as the huge paradigm shifts in society that have also taken place in the last century, there are still far too many people out there who frown upon one of the oldest professions in the world (prostitution) – but, I will leave that for another post.

How To Date A Sex Worker

To start with, if you decide to date me, you must be prepared for the fact that I will have sex with a wide range of guys and couples (I am bisexual and love dating both men and women, including teaching couples how to enjoy sex again for a fee, because I am truly interested in teaching them how to find the pleasure of reconnecting with their feelings! The truth is that people who are workers make their living doing what they do for a living, but I am also one of those people who make my living doing what I do for a living- being a Sydney escort. In spite of the fact that I get paid for doing this, if I were not getting paid for having sex with them, I wouldn’t be doing it at all – I’m only doing it for money. I would not want to have sex with them if it meant nothing to me. It is not the sex I have with clients that gives me meaning – the sex I have with clients is meaningless to me! Could you please read that again. What I do with clients does not have any special meaning for me. It is important for me and my partner that sex be both meaningful and fulfilling for us. In order to have a fulfilling relationship, feelings must be involved.

One of the main points about having sex with clients that many boyfriends seem to have a difficult time understanding is that I am still able to enjoy having sex with them (well, most of them at least), but it no longer holds any significance for me and does not compare to the sex I have with my boyfriend. It is true that there are some guys out there who will always say things like, ‘oh, but you enjoy f****** your clients, if you didn’t, you wouldn’t do it’. I don’t doubt that I am very fond of “f**king” most of them, but some of them don’t seem to understand that I am not choosing my client over my boyfriend. On the contrary, it’s the other way around! As it turns out, it’s the other way around! I want to have love in my heart for the one I go home to, I want to have love in my heart for the one I care for, I want to have love in my heart for the one that I am there for – not my clients.

The fact of the matter is, I could ramble on for hours about so many situations in which sex with clients is just sex, and nothing more, and my final words of wisdom to guys who are trying to grasp this concept is to simply accept it for what it is. You have to accept the fact that it is what it is. You have to accept it and deal with it. Otherwise, you may as well just leave.

Would You Date A Sex Worker?

Relationships with Sex Workers Don’t Mean Sex 24/7

 

Nobody knows why, but it seems to me that the majority of guys think that they will be able to enjoy endless sex all the time when they date a Sex Worker. The reason for this, in my opinion, is that they are dreaming about what it would be like to have a girlfriend who is a Sex Worker. Several times before, I have heard people say that it would be great if they were to date me or another Sydney escort and have them do fantastic blow jobs all the time, and to have mind-blowing sex all the time, for example- these ideals are what we should strive for. Despite this, the reality is very far from these ideals. Can anyone tell me if there is a person who has sex around the clock, all the time, and it is mind blowing? The question that arises is: who among you – even the horniest among you – really wants a blow job every single time? The concept of having a fantasy isn’t wrong, but let’s bring it back to reality for a moment if this idea appeals to you. As a matter of fact, it is difficult to imagine that any girl would wish to provide them with sex and blow jobs at the same time. Most of the time, our clients hire our services as a Sex Worker because they don’t feel that they get enough sex or they don’t get to experience the type of sexual acts that satisfy them in their private lives; therefore, they hire us as a Sydney escort in order to enhance their private lives.

Can you tell me about your favorite food? What is your favorite steak or what is your favorite red wine that you don’t have often? As well as the fact that it tastes great, there is another thing that makes it special when you have it, which is the fact that it is not something that is likely to be experienced very often – because of this, you value it even more when you are offered it. There is only one thing I drink every day, and that is water, just ordinary tap water. I enjoy it so much, but I am not going to spend the entire day talking about how amazing it is despite how much I enjoy it. In particular, this is strikingly true when it comes to mind-blowing sex; there aren’t very many people who get the chance to experience this on a regular basis, but when you do, it is absolutely amazing and can be mind-blowing.

It is important to tell you that there are many aspects of sex that can make it mind blowing for the individual, but that is another story for another time. Did you ever have a sexual experience that you found to be amazing when you had it the first time, or when you experienced it for the first time? Would you consider anal sex to be an amazing sexual experience? Would you consider the use of sex toys to be another great sexual experience?

What did you think when you gave your girlfriend her first facial? As it turns out, whatever it was, I am sure you enjoyed doing it a great deal when you discovered your new found pleasure; however, as time passed, while you still enjoyed it a lot, it didn’t provide you with the same pleasure as it did when you first discovered it; then perhaps you moved on to try something else or maybe you quit completely.

Let’s consider the possibility of having a Sex Worker as your girlfriend. What we do as a business is to provide sexual service to people.

It is safe to say that almost all of us will agree that the majority of our time is spent providing sexual services for money, whether we work 5 days a week or nights a week, some more and some less. In the event that we spend a majority of our time each week providing sexual services to our clients, would you think that we would be inclined to continue having sex outside of work as well? No, of course not. As I have mentioned before, you often hear about painters who do not seem to have the time to finish their own home painting, or plumbers who never seem to have the time to fix their own leaking pipes. Why do we think this is so? Often, when people get home from work, they are looking forward to nothing more than sleeping and doing what they did all day for work!

It is in no way my intention to suggest that Sex Workers do not seek out meaningful and fulfilling sex outside of what they engage in with their clients; however, the sex we engage in with our clients is not as meaningful or fulfilling as the sex we have with our significant other. Although this will certainly satisfy our sex fetish it will not satisfy the fantasy where it is only sex we want all the time. In order to achieve that any relationship in which there is sexual involvement is fulfilling, and fulfilling for both parties, there is a lot of hard work and a lot of effort that both parties will need to put in.

It’s crucial to communicate often when dating a Sydney escort, but it’s even more so if it’s your first time together

Having already touched on this topic, and if you are feeling jealous about the fact that your girlfriend, who is an escort, has an extensive range of men who sleep with her besides you, then please do not let it get to you. Please talk to us. If you begin to feel resentful or withdrawn due to the fact that you believe we are giving our attention and time to others than to you, then I urge you to speak up with us. The more you keep negative feelings inside, the worse it will be for everyone. Just remember that we cannot read our minds, and the longer you keep them inside the worse it will be for everyone. It isn’t possible to find a Sex Worker in the entire world who doesn’t know that the majority of guys who want to date us are likely to be insecure or nervous about the fact that we are capable of having sex with others – but that is our job, and you knew that when you decided to date us. The majority of those of you who are interested in dating us met us while we worked as a Sydney escort!

There is no doubt in my mind that you are impressed when we communicate with you when we tell you whatever is on our minds, and I am sure that you are delighted when we share how we are feeling. As long as we feel safe and won’t be afraid of your negative judgment, it is normal for us to discuss any issues related to our job with you, as long as we feel safe and we won’t feel threatened by it. One of the most common misconceptions is that Sex Workers will not share too much information about their jobs with their partners, for fear that their partner will become jealous. The truth is, if we are unable to speak to you openly and to share our emotions with you, as any other person in the same position would, the relationship will begin to fail and fall apart.

The Mental Aspects of Sexual Work are more Challenging than its Physical Aspects

 

The majority of our clients who do not want sex want their emotional needs to be met as soon as possible, even if sex is not their primary need. According to reports, many clients book the services for 2-3 hours of sex, but they spend as little as 30 minutes in actual sex. However, what do the clients do with the remainder of the time? Often, the only time people feel like they can really be themselves in a safe, judgment-free environment is the first time they confide in us, get their worries off their chest, ask us for advice, share their families, their work, how their wives do not want to sleep with them – for many clients, the only time they feel like they can be themselves is when they book a Sydney escort. Also, there are several guys who book time with us for the purpose of escaping their daily lives, and pretending to be whoever or whatever they want – this could mean taking part in role playing, or just experimenting with how their secret identities look like. We as Sex Workers provide our clients with that sanctuary, whether it’s in the form of a fantasy land or a mini escape for them.

We provide emotional therapy and support to our clients, and through that I have been able to gain an understanding of many aspects of the human condition and of life that I would not normally have been aware of. As far as I’m concerned, I personally think most of it is very interesting and enjoyable on the whole; however, it takes a lot of energy to do it.

It has been my pleasure to work with psychologists who are Sydney escorts. Some of them still practice as well as perform escorts outside of their normal working hours, while others have left the profession entirely. All of them agree that meeting the emotional needs of men is a much more difficult task for a Sex Worker. The majority of men are very demanding and they generally hold us to high standards, so much so that it is quite common for us to feel tired and lethargic, and this may be the very reason we withdraw from our partner in our private lives.

It may come as a surprise to you as a Sex Workers, for example, that she is not as present with you as she usually is, especially when you are with her. Here is where the importance of effective communication comes into play. It is true that every Sex Worker is unique, but I do find that I feel more comfortable when my partner gives me some privacy when it is needed. In spite of this, it is good to realise that some people find that when they complain about not having the time to spend with each other, they actually need some love and affection directed in the right direction. I would recommend that if this is the case, you express your understanding of the situation. There are many Sydney escorts, myself included, at times, find it just too difficult to further differentiate emotionally between Jasmine the Escort and Jasmine the girlfriend that she just so happens to be at the same time. Most of the time, I feel this way when I am feeling tired, anxious, overworked, or stressed, or a combination of all of those factors. As a Sex Worker, it can be difficult at times to juggle two very different personalities, one of which is a Sex Worker and the other of which is a girlfriend. There is nothing more important than having a partner who gives us the freedom to talk to you about how we perceive our sex work, how we feel, and how the work is affecting you. The result of this is often very positive and this can lead to even stronger connections as time goes on. 

Working in the Sex Industry is a Real Job

For my part, I find it to be cruel and vile to produce a TV show focused on depicting Sex Work as a highlight reel where all Escorts are featured as women who are swimming in cash, spending most of their time at nail salons and hairdressers, even more so when they are actually employed as Escorts, they are in the company of only the very wealthy attending dinner parties and hosting her on yachts whenever possible. As far as I am concerned, that is far from the truth. In addition to being an executive assistant, you would be expected to perform the role of a part-time psychologist (giving advice and listening to a client’s concerns as well as managing the client’s emotions). Being a receptionist (making bookings in advance and at the last minute for clients) and working in customer service. Experience in bookkeeping (must have experience in taxes, superannuation, and financial planning) is considered a plus. As a marketing expert (doing social media postings & advertisements), I have a lot of experience in this area. As a sex worker, you must be a fitness expert, trainer (you need knowledge about nutrition and exercise so you can stay in shape and be attractive to your clients) and, in addition to all that, you need to perform the physical labor required by sex work. There is one more thing I forgot to mention. Thank you. We need to do all of the “normal” things in life such as being a good partner, having social activities, spending time with family, and having a good social life. I don’t intend this to be a “poor me” rant, since I have chosen to become a Sex Worker, but rather as a way of exposing the reality of what it’s like to be a Sex Worker.

Sex Workers Don’t Need to be Saved by their Boyfriend

It is my choice to become a Sex Worker out of a variety of career paths. I am responsible for the choices I make in my life, and I take responsibility for my actions. For this reason, I need not be saved by a man. There are sadly a lot of people in the world who are forced into prostitution and are being forced to stay in it without their permission, which is essentially the same thing as sex slavery. My aim is not to find a boyfriend who believes that he has to save me from the world of Sex Work in order to redeem me. Despite what you may think, I believe that not everyone enjoys their job, that there will always be certain parts of any job that are less enjoyable. This is also the case when it comes to being an escort. Spending time with some clients is not quite as enjoyable as it could be according to them. Quite honestly, I cannot be bothered to be f**ked going to suck someone’s cock for money all the time. Over the course of my time as an escort, I have often thought about whether I would rather be doing something else rather than being an escort. Sadly, the answer to that question is no. To me, it is very important that I have a boyfriend whom I can share both the good and the bad things that have happened to me in my life. For me, it is incredibly important that my boyfriend inspires me to become a better person and to experience greater fulfillment in life. That might sound a little cliché, but it is incredibly true. I mean, who wouldn’t want that from a partner?

It’s my hope that this helps you make an informed decision if you’re considering dating a Sex Worker. Everyone wants their loved ones to be supportive.